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"To Be or Not to Be…Or Something Like That" by Katie Smith

Updated: Jul 26, 2022



The real question is: to decorate or not to decorate…a nursery? The answer: do whatever you want. Really. It’s your journey, it’s your story, and you get to be the author. We had some folks who encouraged us to set one up and others who thought it was a horrible idea. We did it anyways! For those who had experienced failed matches, they led us to believe that it would become an abyss of bitterness and heartbreak. And to be honest, on a few occasions it was. My theory was whether it took 5 days or 5 years…I WAS going to be a mom…and that nursery WOULD be used. We decorated in navy, mint, and grays. All gender neutral and adorable. Despite the few days that looking at that nursery brought me to tears and longing, the other days it was my little hope hubble! I would sit in there and rock and dream about what our baby would look like. Or smell like. Or sound like. Would it be a boy? Or a girl? What state would we venture to? Online shopping? Yes, please. I would sit and pray. I prayed so much. I would cry in there. I would organize. And then reorganize. I would read in there, children’s books and adult books. A lot of days it was something productive to do to keep my mind busy. This post is short but that is because I just wanted to remind you that you are in control of the narrative. There is no right or wrong way to wait. Your journey is just that, YOURS. Regardless of whether you have a nursery set up or not, you will have good days and bad days. One day, you are going to be changing the grossest of poopy diapers on that changing table with the giggliest of babies and you wouldn’t have it any other way. That nursery will be everything you HOPED for and more!

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